The absolute worst part about the move and about the military is total lack of control. You don't really know it, but once you get married you're escorted into a limo with a runaway cab driver who won't listen and has his own agenda.
Ok, so I knew before signing up I was going to Fort Rucker- but I was pretty much still in LA LA land. I had gotten into a van with a dude who promised to take me to Candy Mountain and I slowly learned that was not so.
Alright so I'm starting to feel like something is up. What actually happened was I wanted to have a quick "I Do" sign some papers, etc so we could get started on our life together and then plan a big howdy do a year later. Nope. Here's why:
1) Need to get wedding insurance in case of deployment.
2) Can't get wedding insurance without leave papers
3) Can't get leave papers until getting a unit in March
4) Will find out when we get the unit in March if he will deployed.
5) Can't get leave papers if getting deployed.
6) Can't getting wedding insurance
7) No wedding. Good luck you all!
At this point I realize something is definitely weird. After a year of jumping through various hoops we put in our top 3 destinations, which as I learned don't matter. You just sit, waiting, having no real idea where or when.
Alright so the bend over jokes are crude, but it shows that you are talking to someone without logic who just doesn't care what you have to say. It's like being driven around and handcuffed by a psychotic teen.
At some point I realized that the military isn't actually listening to me. It can be sort of nice and provide you with organizations to help you out- like the Family Readiness Program, schools, etc- as compensation for the lack of control and you and your spouse get (and in some cases those who actually put their life on the line for the country, which is actually less people then you'd expect. People forget that you can be in the army and work at a desk or in a warehouse- which I'm not saying isn't important it's just different.)
Some people are cool with the lack of control and going with the eb and flow easily.
While I love new places, exploring, and making new friends, the inability to go and do things where and when I want will always be hard.
I'll make the best of El Paso and who knows maybe I'll even love it- but for now I wish my voice would count.